Forgotten Moments We Can't Share: Musings on Shared Culture and Solitude

"They call it youthful idealism / And even I would have to agree with them / Some of us grow up, and it's still there"-Operation Ivy, "Junkie's Running Dry."

When I think of coming of age in the late 1990s and early 2000s, I often find myself attempting to recapture those moments of silence or solitude that still existed in an era before social media and 24 hour news cycles took over. While we had cellphones, they were not the pocket computers of today, social media did not exist as it does now, and people could still use the excuse that they were not at home to answer the phone. No one expected us to be on call at all hours of the day, nor did they battle over political talking points in the stratified way they do now. Instead, we could "turn on, tune in, and drop out" like the previous generation, albeit with different drugs and drama, in ways that are often not available to younger generations.

I was a master at "dropping out" in those days, walking for hours in the woods, feeling alone in a crowd at punk rock shows, and trying to get it together to earn an English degree. I often didn't return calls and disappeared for days at a time. I eventually learned how to be a student and had to make progress in my life. However, I still relish those days because I could drop off the grid without disappearing to our family cabin. I could work at home, writing, revising, and living without feeling like I was missing something. We turned the television on for news and entertainment but were not always plugged in. We had LiveJournal and MySpace to share our thoughts, music, and pick friends for our "Top Eight" list. However, it was easier to disconnect. 

As an aside to the purposes of this blog, even though I have always been a movie fan, I stopped paying attention in the early 2000s and missed many of that period's "classics." I have been making up for it since, but I do not regret taking a break. That said, I started drifting away from the "shared culture" that many people still talk about. I was still listening to copious amounts of music and participating in a vibrant community. A much discussed narrative trope that started during that period underscores the solitude: "no one had a cellphone." Later, writers had to find a way for characters to forget theirs. 

Sadly, much of this social media technology has also lead people away from a shared culture and civility in many cases. There are so many  options for media and viewpoints, which should help bring us together, and often does, but culture feels splintered because of this abundance of choice. Many people do not feel like they have a physical place to belong or a roadmap for making choices. However, the lack of rules has many positive attributes that break down creative barriers. Others have a near unlimited platform for sharing their displeasure and crank beliefs. Sometimes these people find groups to join for a mutual culture of resentment, but it does not have to be this way. 

These technological advancements could help bring us together if we take the time to unplug. Of course, that is much harder than it used to be because the conscious choice has to be ours. People must choose to unplug from a world that is getting harder to escape. It does not mean that we should give up on social issues, friends, or our obligations. It just means that we need to be more conscious in general to avoid social media ego battles, create positive culture, and find peace. While much has changed, there is still room for community and solitude.